How Can We Get through Our Pain?

By Laurie Hunter

Updated on September 1, 2025

When we miss a loved one, have health issues, struggle with the holidays, lose our faith, deal with injustice, or experience tragedy, how do we get through it?

Have the Courage to Reach Out

During the most difficult times of our lives, we ask, Why is this happening to me?” The sooner we stop asking, “Why me?” the sooner we’ll ask better questions, the kind that will shed light on our current situation. Pain is about learning and growing. Pain is also about coming closer to a family member, a friend, ourselves, or maybe God. Everyone has someone who can help them through difficult times. Everyone. We have to push through the pain and get to the other side of suffering. We must summon the courage to reach out to others who can help us move through it.

Ask Questions and Find Strength

If you’re feeling anguish, you are not alone. Hang in there. Ask yourself questions and answer honestly. Ask family, friends, God, and ourselves to advance to the other side of our pain. Because when we do, we’ll be stronger. We will learn things we did not know before, and we’ll grow and become smarter. We’ll reach out, accept help, and develop our relationships within family, friends, God, and strengthen our relationship with ourselves.

Dispel the Cloudy, Visionless Place of Pain

Grieving and receiving hugs and sympathy from others is an essential part of healing. However, reading, journaling, learning, and holding on to our vision can give us comfort and healing that will nudge us through. When we’re hurting, it may seem impossible to push through the cloudy, visionless place of pain. Journaling can help us dispose of the darkness in our heads and put hope on paper. It can help us understand, develop patience, and mend. Most importantly, it can help us develop a more positive vision to focus on rather than our pain.

Positively and Healthily Advance through Agony

When our anguish lessens, our work is not over either. We have to make decisions as to how we will proceed. Will we choose to be wounded and egocentric? Or will we be more introspective, empathic, and empowered? If we ask ourselves these questions and answer honestly, then we can learn, grow, and bounce back.

Aren’t we less likely to remain wounded and egocentrically focused on our feelings if we choose to work on growing and developing our relationships with family, friends, God, and ourselves? And if we focus on a vision, aren’t we more likely to positively and healthily advance through our agony?

Sometimes it may seem like some people have everything going for them. No one is immune from suffering. No one. We are all at different points in our lives, experiencing highs and lows. We may be suffering from different sources of pain at different times in our lives. But we are all in this together. And, together, we can keep pushing each other through.